My birthday is in two days. For some reason, I keep feeling I'm not ready to step into another age.
Before I'm 18, I want 18 to come quick probably because I'm waiting for some magical change when I reach 18. I would become more responsible, wiser, happier, so on and so on. I think when I'm 18 I will be at better use for people around me. But here I am, almost 19 and I feel no different to me when I'm 16. I go to different school, study higher but is there anything that is different 'bout me? I think I look the same. I haven't grow at all last year. I live with my parent, get allowance. I go to school and go back to home. My life haven't change at all and I'm scare.
I've been an official adult for a year and I have yet to accomplish anything. That doesn't feel right. What should I do with my life is still unclear. What do I want? I don't even know. Every time I meet with question such as what is your favourite food? What is your favourite movie? I skip. I don't understand myself anymore. Some how the talkative girl with opinion disappear but in stead of some more mature woman in her place there is nothing. How can I bring this mess with me into 19. If the inside girl don't grow what is the point of celebrate the body get old?
Is it just me or everybody has to gone through this state of confuse?
1 comment:
Hi, there!
Happy Birthday!
You don't have to ask about yourself. I did think that I understand me myself so much when I was less than 18, but then I realize that I absolutely have no idea about it. It's normal. Being officially adult doesn't mean that you have to accomplish anything. Probably you did but you don't recognize it. If you're not sure about your achivements, ask your parents or friends, they would have the best answers. FuAnyway, be yourself as you are, and don't worry about your life. It will be fine.
I can't answer what my favorite food or movie is, either. However, I adore food and movies.
Have fun with your 19th birthday!
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